A letter to my younger self

A letter to my younger self

If I could go back in time and speak to my younger self, this is what I’d say….

I hate to tell you this but you’re going to get really sick and have a life limiting condition. But there might be a way to prevent it. 

Alternative medicine has never crossed your mind because you’ve never been ill. However illness is brewing within you. Disease forms when you’re not at ease, when you’re frustrated by your life and annoyed at how things have panned out. You have been masking sadness for years. You’ll go to therapy believing it will help you process everything that has happened in your life but that won’t be enough to stop you becoming unwell. Alternative medicine, especially homeopathy, will aid the therapeutic process. It will balance your emotions in a way therapy can’t. It will help you manage the emotional shocks that are heading your way and limit their damage on your body. 

You’ve never been completely happy or fulfilled in your career. You’ve changed jobs hoping things will be different but you’ve never questioned whether you’re actually working in the right field. You are much more creative than you think and you need to be in a more dynamic, inspiring environment. 

If these preventative measures don’t work because the illness is predestined or caused by another factor, this is what you need to do to get better faster and with less suffering. 

You need to see an orthodontist to realign your jaw. You’ll have to wear a dental brace but it will be worth it. You must also surround yourself with alternative healers and learn from them. The modalities that will be most beneficial are cranial osteopathy, homeopathy and Ayurveda. 

You need to adopt a healing mind-set. You must believe, despite the doctors’ prognosis, that you will get better. Never doubt it. The modern approach is to push through pain and discomfort, e.g.: “You have to show your body who’s boss. If you have a sprained ankle, walk on it. If you have sensitive hearing, stand in a noisy building.” This creates a conflict in your body which is not conducive to healing. Disease means your body is already in conflict, don’t create more.

You need to surrender to the illness, listen to your body and accept where you’re up to. If you feel too ill to leave the house, stay at home. If someone asks how you are feeling, don’t suppress your emotions and put on a brave face; tell the truth. Acknowledging the physical symptoms is not the same as giving into them. It’s a temporary measure to enable your body to heal. You can bring everything back into your life when you’re strong and healthy enough to enjoy them but for now you need to retreat from the world and, believe it or not, you need to do embroidery.

This illness will push you and your relationships to the limit but you will get through it and afterwards you’ll be more content. 

Always remember you are resilient, resourceful and loved. 

You are The Girl Who Refused To Quit. 

A picture of me in my early 20s when I was trying to get my career off the ground. Within a year I’d experience a number of losses, including a family bereavement. I briefly saw a therapist but stopped believing I could stoically soldier on. I was wrong. Ten years later the cycle repeats, I spend longer in therapy but illness starts to brew. This young, hopeful version of myself is who the letter is for.


Previous post

This is an extract from a chapter I wrote called Tinnitus & Social Isolation: A Healing Journey for the compilation book The Girls Who Refused to Quit – Volume 2. It is available on Amazon and other online booksellers. 

2 thoughts on “A letter to my younger self

  1. What a great letter to yourself! Your story in ‘The Girl’s Who Refused to Quit’ makes us understand how the isolation and pain affected your whole life. So glad you have shared your story to help others in similar situations 💖 Natalie x


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